Role Models
When I was growing up in America, there were several icons in our society providing influence to the American image. For my generation, John Wayne provided an image where real men are tough and gritty, usually loners, drinkers, and when faced with a challenge, we clench the reigns of our horse in our teeth and charge at our adversaries with a gun in each hand. Clint Eastwood showed men do not show emotions other than anger or disgust, we wear dark shades, sometimes have primates as friends, and in a final conflict, we let the enemy make a choice – in case they feel lucky. Sean Connery provided a different approach with women, confidence in purpose and style, an interest in technical gadgets, and left me wondering if I should adopt a really cool accent (I never did). Then Burt Reynolds contributed a fast, black Trans-Am, wise-crack comments, and a complete ignorance to posted speed limits.
Does this make them bad influences or good? I render these gentlemen, as well as the innumerable celebrities and role models for my generation up through the current, guilty of entertainment only. While they are examples of movie characters, the choice was always mine to accept or disregard. Whether I acted like a hardened cowboy or Green Beret, talked with a rigid jaw and sneer, ordered my drinks shaken and not stirred, or drove like Sheriff Buford T. Justice was “blowin’ down my doors”, the choice was mine to accept their portrayal of life or to adopt my own. I make the choices in my life. I am responsible for them.
Some might say celebrity role models have a great responsibility for our youth. This couldn’t be further from the truth. I believe this is passing the buck and parents are wussing out by not accepting their own responsibilities for their children. In that celebrity role models provide a lifestyle option or a choice is undeniable, but the authority to shape the youth is with the parent (or legal guardian). This is not only set forth in the American Constitution (as it stands today), it is Biblical.
In Deuteronomy 11:19, we are instructed to teach the Lord’s commandments with, “Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” We are also told in Proverbs 22:6, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
These portions of Scripture establish the instruction of nurturing for the parent to our children. The Bible does not say “allow others to teach your children”. Instead, we see the clear description of “your children”, the children entrusted to us as our responsibility (whether parent or guardian).
These verses also express we should “Talk about [God’s instructions] when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” While the verse is referring to the Lord’s commandments, we have sufficient evidence to know the Lord wants our instruction to our children to be continuous.
Why?
Because, if you “Train a child in the way he should go… when he is old he will not turn from it.” This single verse says so much to raising children, beginning with the very first word. Raising children and teaching them is a process of training and education. For what purpose? So when they are older, they will not turn away from the good lessons provided. As we look at this exercise, we should recognize we do not need to train children to be children – this will happen naturally. However, we do need to train them to be adults. We are raising our children to be adults, not children.
This may be the downfall for many celebrity role models today - nobody ever trained them to be adults. They were not trained to know adults do not throw temper-tantrums, yelling obscenities, and cursing others. They were not trained to respect others. They were not trained to know they are merely human beings, not gods. They were not trained… (you fill in the blanks).
As adults, every person must make decisions and accept the consequences for those choices. In training our children, the process of seeking wisdom in the course of their lives is crucial to making decisions. Children are required to learn how to make good decisions and how to accept responsibility for their decisions.
Our challenge and responsibility is in the training. I have never raised three children before, nor has my wife. Our trust is in the Lord and in His wisdom. We trust He will guide us in raising and training our children, and in turn, that He will guide them in their decisions.
So, if we train our children to be adults, to know how to make proper decisions by seeking the wisdom of the Lord, will role models, actors, or movie characters be an influence – or merely entertainment?
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Glenn Sasscer
www.glennsasscer.com
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